Being Killed By Kindness
Let's be honest here - I'm a decent person. At least, that's what I believe, and what I consider to be an honest statement.
I don't do harm to other people, I may be a bit of a jokester, but I never really do anything malicious.
I sit here staring at the multiple online profiles of girls who have ripped me off for thousands of dollars, and don't miss a wink of sleep at night. They go about their days as if the world owes them something. They don't seem to care that they made promises to pay back money or even provide any sort of companionship. The money I gave them (or "loaned", in some cases) is my pain to work off, and their benefit. I never got any real pleasure out of that, I might as well have lit it on fire - it may have lasted longer, and wouldn't feel so melancholy now.
You see, for it to have been just one person, I could have disregarded it. But to have it done by multiple people both makes me look (and feel) like an absolute idiot, and also makes me believe that a vast majority of people by nature are absolutely horrible human beings.
Even after confronted with the truth, the promises of repayment and payback are empty, answered only with silence or more excuses. Typically the former. It doesn't really make me forget it - not only am I still paying it off, but it's such absolutely absurd situations to have been in and look back on in disbelief. All I did was try to be understanding, kind and decent, and it was met with false promises and a lot of very interesting lies.
What did I do to deserve this? How are these people so comfortable with manipulation? What is it in me that can't decide to be manipulative and take advantage of others for my gain to try to pay off the massive dent in my life that these pathetic excuses have left behind?
A lot of people seem to believe in karma. "They'll get what's coming to them" and such. I don't see anything bad happening to them so far. I seem them flourishing in fact...